Reward

Today I took Emily out by myself for a well deserved reward trip as she is mastering the art of potty training.

First we went to Target, her most favorite store in the world. Why? Because the trains live there of course and her reward was a new train. She wavered on what to buy. She was set on getting Arthur but once we arrived she decided she wanted Murdock,

No, wait, Maivis

No, wait, Culdee

No, wait, You get the idea

Finally, we happened across a version of James that had bees painted on him. The train went with the story "James Goes Buzz Buzz." Emily loves that story so James it was.

After picking a train, I let Emily pick Sondra's birthday card. She picked a great one based on the puppet on the front who was blue. Then I tried to get her to pick some scrapbooking stickers for mommy, but nothing caught her attention.

We ate lunch at Wendy's which is Emily's favorite because of the kid's frosty that comes with her meal. We ate healthy, both having sandwiches. She also had yogurt and I had baked lays. Aside from the frosty it was as healthy a meal as we might have had at home.

As Emily smiled at me while eating, I remember thinking about how blessed I am to be living this moment in my life. We laughed, talked and shared our food with each other. It was great fun.

When we were ready to leave I gathered our trash on the tray. I told Emily to follow me to the trash can. She wanted to be carried. I explained and showed her how my hands would be full and the power struggle began. Picture if you will Emily standing at the edge of the table, arms at her side, still as a rock. I gave her no choice in the matter but when I began to leave, she just stood there. As I rounded the corner to the trash can and looked back, she just grinned at me.

Now most parents who have a child with any sort of will have been in this situation. Let's remember for a second that Emily is 3 and those who know her will attest to her stubborn will. By now, we have the attention of the tables near us. Two moms with children are paying especially close attention (perhaps they've been through this). Most parents in my situation would simply pick up their child to avoid a scene.

Not me.

I sat on the bench and explained to Emily that even though my hands were now empty that she was going to hold my hand a walk out because that's what Papa told her to do and she must do what I say. She would not take my hand when I stood up. I looked down at her and calmly told her that we are going now. I took her hand and started to walk to the door. She took 2 steps and started screaming "NO!, NO PAPA!" Emily started to drag her feet so I dragged her out of Wendys. Once outside the door she suddenly found the ability to walk. Isn't she a smart one? :)

Having just received a new toy, I told her that the Buzz Buzz James was going to be taken away but she would have a chance to earn it back. We still had to buy Sondra a birthday gift, and that meant one more store. With the Emily meltdown in full effect, I knew that she would have to work hard to behave.

Ultimately, the goal of any punishment is to get the child to use a replacement behavior. Emily did just that. She held my hand throughout the store and was a great shopper. We didn't have any luck finding a gift so we got mommy a gift card (which was on her list and she insisted was ok).